A Triangle of Terror
The great taming of the camelids had consequences that continue to resonate from far Patagonia to a modest alpaca farm just north of San Francisco
A gentle lady rancher is horrified by the facts of life
Only humans befriend and betray their prey at scale
Among the planet’s major predator species, only humans nurture their own prey. While other predators coldly stalk their victims before they ravage them, we humans — we modern humans — prefer to spend time with them and win their trust before we slay them and masticate their flesh. This practice has many virtues and efficiencies. It saves us the tiring trouble of the chase and allows us to slaughter our unsuspecting quarry at our convenience, at any pace and in any quantity. But perhaps its greatest benefit to humans — our befriending and then betraying, at scale, the fauna we find most digestible — is the moral benefit. It lets us regard ourselves as civilized, as something higher and more refined than fanged, rapacious monsters craving blood.
The cougar, or puma, or mountain lion — the culprit in a spectacular, violent incident which we will examine further down — takes a rather more …
30 WAYS OF LOOKING AT WILL OLDHAM
In which we consider His Concert, His Stage, His First Song, His Audience, His Name, His Dimensions, His Jeans, His Belt, His Feet, His Mustache, His Mouth, His Voice, His Words, His Fifth Song, His Accompanists, His Thoughts, His Forehead, His Hat, His Eyes, His Hands, His Shirt, His Guitar, His Right Hand, His Left Hand, His Accompanists (Again), His Tenth Song, His Disposition, His Last Song, His Moon, and His Final Lines.
Man, that’s a fuck-load of words.
All hail Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy!
HIS CONCERT
…tonight is in South Brooklyn, over which the Sturgeon Moon hangs low and orange and near level with the land, its light smudged thin and orange in clouds and windowpanes, drifting out dim over the streets and rowhomes and the hullish building where he now takes the stage.
HIS STAGE
...is in a place called Pioneer Works which in the century preceding this one and in the century preceding that one was an ironworks for the manufacture of boilers and railroads and steamrollers. From its gray concrete floors and redbrick walls and thick woodbeams up there in the rafters its former function is not hard to imagine. Until Oldham starts to play, and then it seems it was …
Additional Information
The thought began as the end of a dream and dovetailed into wakefulness. It was an odd thought to have in a dream — coming at me not as one of the surreal and fractured impulses that usually bombard me during my REM cycle, but more as a complete vocalized sentence.
It was more like a remembered song lyric. You need to get a physical, was the thought. Not a very dreamlike message or a terribly catchy or poetic phrase for a song lyric (is there even a rhyme for “physical?”), but the words grabbed my attention, as if they had been scribbled on a Post-it with “TO DO!” written importantly across the top. I tried to put it out of my head and go about my morning business (shit, shave, shower, coffee), but it nagged me.
It had been years since I’d had a physical. Many people would find that irresponsible. I like to think of myself as a take-care-of-business kind of guy, so that kind of …